Saturday, January 15, 2011

day three.

woke up at 123.8 lbs. don't have a clue how that happened but i'm not complaining by any means. i guess i can just thank metabolism, since i totally fucked up yesterday.

i'm going to the zoo with my dad and his girlfriend today, which means LOTS of walking, which means lots of calories burned. so i'm pretty pumped. hopefully i can be out of the 120s by the time i go back to school on tuesday. four pounds in three days? totally doable. it'll just take work. but, i can do it. i've been looking at a lot of thinspo lately. i got this. AND my mother posted a facebook status saying she'd lost 11 pounds since new years. fuck that, i'm not letting that bitch lose more than me. fuck no. i'll be at 98lbs before she can even get to 120. fuck that shit. got this shit on lock. ;]

day four:
got caught purging at my boyfriend's house. he was so disappointed in me, :/. the way he looked at me when i was on my knees in front of the toilet pathetically literally made me want to die. that boy means the world to me and having him disappointed in me is the worst feeling in the world. dfkjthfg. fuck.

day five/six:
woke up back at 125 so i decided to do a three day liquid fast. so far today i've had a bottle of water, a powerade zero, a 5 hour energy (4 calories), a capri sun (60 calories) and a hot chocolate (210 calories). i'm going to work out when i'm done with my chores/homework and hopefully work off all the calories and stick to water for the rest of the day. i'm really not even hungry. so, that's good i guess. hopefully i can get out of dinner. i really don't feel like purging tonight after what happened at mike's.


  1. "got that shit on the lock." hahhaa that cracked me up! just might have to steal that phrase ;)

    sorry about what happened at mike's, that's horrible! did he know about your ED before he caught you?

    stay strong, think thin, live ana

  2. haha feel free(:

    & apparently so. i didn't know he knew but apparently he did.